I am the worst at making decisions. Right now I am faced with making a decision about whether or not to partake in the Quad Screen for the baby growing inside me.
I declined this testing when I was carrying Natalie. Honestly, I probably would've done this testing if it hadn't been for Laurie's awful experience. She received false positive results and worried - needlessly - for almost two weeks before being reassured that all was, in fact, well with BBT. I remember many a phone conversation with her during that time, and it made up my mind. That kind of stress cannot be good for mama or baby.
I should also admit that I was completely naive during my first pregnancy. For the most part, I believed that once you conceived and took care of yourself, you were guaranteed a healthy baby after 9 months of womb-providing and many hours of labor. I have since met and read the blogs of countless mamas who did not share my same fortune with their pregnancies as I did with my first. I cannot even begin to imagine the depth of their sorrow, the pain of their heartache.
This reality has put a bit of a gray cloud over my head this time around. I can't help but worry ... which makes me wonder if the Quad Screen would be a good thing for me. Perhaps it would soothe my concerns, put my mind at ease, lift that cloud. But false positive results hold the promise of needless worry and stress. There's also the very real possibility that the results will not be false, but rather my worst fears realized. Am I ready for that?
Decision needs to be made by Thursday so I can get bloodwork before 18 weeks (on Friday). How am I going to fall asleep?
5 comments:
OH Dana, I do not envy your decision at all. Go with whatever will give you the most peace, friend. And know that I am only a phone call away to help you through the stress of waiting.
I'm with Chi-town--do what brings you peace. Regardless of the results, false or not, you have an amazing network of friends and family to support you. I opted out my first time around too, and probably will the next time...however, I prefer to live in denial :)
FYI--LOVE the new pic of you and Natalie!
You'll worry and stress no matter what. IF not this. Then that. Promise. I think I'd rather know than be blind.
Do it. IF something arises you will have time to educate and prepare yourself for a new journey as you know you would want to do. The things in life that scare us.. are things that we are not prepared for. You'll get another ultrasound in the least! And they tell you right there.. if measurements look good etc.
xoxoxo
dont' fret. too much more to worry about. you can handle anything .. even false positives.
:)
d
You know we did do it this time, but did not do it w/ S. I did it mostly for the extra ultrasounds picts. A little selfish I suppose. For us the results wouldn't have changed our minds about the child, so we did it. However, I do think that it can be
a REALLY stressful event. So I wish you the best on the decision. Just let me know if you decide to do it and if you need me to watch little Miss N for you. Sahara would be happy to have another PD soon :)
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