If you're wondering what this is all about, read the prompt.
It's true. I've become a little obsessed with infomercials as of late. I have no idea why I've even succumbed to the evils of middle-of-the-night television in the first place. I mean, granted I am awake ... and serving as the milk truck for one hungry newborn ... but really, I need to find a better way to pass the time ... gazing lovingly at the face of my beautiful baby girl, reading the classics, composing blog posts in my head, ..
It's also worth noting that I do not have cable (yes, I know, gasp!), so watching a rerun of Trading Spaces or music videos or stand-up comedy is out of the question. I plop down with a pillow and baby in my lap, grab the remote, and proceed to surf all 13 channels of basic. And what I find on about 75% of those channels (Supah, how many channels would that be? Could you do the math for me?) are infomercials. Some cheesy lady asking probing questions about how to use a fabulous cleaning product. A ripped guy claiming to guarantee a six-pack like his. A plethora of "celebrities" loaning their face and good name to validate a face cream or smoothie blender or whatever. The actual value is always some unreasonable amount of money followed by the ridiculously low price you can pay in installments. And after watching 30 minutes of testimonials and before-and-afters, I am giving just a few minutes to make up my mind, pick up the phone, and become the proud owner of said life-changing product.
Somehow that little formula for
disaster advertising lures me in time and time again. Pure genius, I tell ya!
Currently, I am
only jokingly seriously thinking about ordering ...
The Wen Hair Care System - say good bye to your shampoo and cleanse your hair instead ... with some conditioner stuff. When I hear the word cleanse, I think of feminine hygiene. Melissa Gilbert promises great results, and the guy who invented this stuff is entirely too pretty for his own good.
Murad Resurgence - promising younger looking skin in just 30 days! Joan Lunden sure does look good for 57! The before-and-afters are remarkable! And I like Dr. Murad .... his little glasses and white lab coat ... gotta trust a guy like that ... to take aging women to the freakin' bank!
Health Master by Montel Williams - I really do not need another blender, but there's something about Montel that I just can't resist! Oh, and this thing is actually an emulsifier, not a blender. How crazy is it that you can cook soup in that thing?