Sunday, April 4, 2010

All About MEme - Love Language

with MommyBrain and SupahMommy


What's your LOVE LANGUAGE? 
suggested by our friend ...

Messy Mommy

"What if you could say or do just the right thing guaranteed to make that special someone feel loved? The secret is learning the right love language! Millions of couples have learned the simple way to express their feelings and bring joy back into marriage: The Five Love Languages, Dr. Gary Chapman’s New York Times bestseller! Words of Affirmation—Actions don’t always speak louder than words. If this is your love language, unsolicited compliments mean the world to you. Hearing the words, “I love you,” are important—hearing the reasons behind that love sends your spirits skyward. Insults can leave you shattered and are not easily forgotten."  from
Make a guess.  Which do you think is your Love Language?
Words of Affirmation
Quality Time
Receiving Gifts
Acts of Service
Physical Touch

Find out if your guess is right. 
Take this assessment quiz and tell us the results!
There are two to choose from.
One takes 30 seconds,  one takes about 3 minutes.

See what they tell you about yourself! Then TELL US!
Was it different than you expected?
Did you test your mate? Let us know!


Prepare to be a tiny bit envious ...

I've been in love for half my life.  With the same man.

A man who vacuums once a week,
cleans the toilets when I ask,
empties the (ridiculously foul) litter box,
folds laundry on occasion (but doesn't hang up my shirts),
never leaves his dirty clothes on the floor,
cleans the kitchen - we have an "I cook, You clean" policy,
changes poopy diapers (he's good at weaseling out of this one),
gives baths and read bedtime stories,
let's me sleep in on the weekends,
spends five hours detailing my car as a Mother's Day gift,
makes breakfast for dinner (his speciality), ...

Now, that's my kind of man!  
I know that I am lucky.  I also know that I am loved.

That list proves that my husband best communicates his love through
Acts of Service, which happens to be my primary love language, too.

From The 5 Love Languages website: Can vacuuming the floors really be an expression of love? Absolutely! Anything you do to ease the burden of responsibilities weighing on an “Acts of Service” person will speak volumes. The words he or she most want to hear: “Let me do that for you.” Laziness, broken commitments, and making more work for them tell speakers of this language their feelings don’t matter.
I guess I am in the mindset that actions definitely speak louder than words.  Considering the fact that CPV is a man of very few words, it seems that's a very good thing.  I love being taken care of and I love taking care of him, in return.  We both need tidiness and organization in our lives in order to function. Chores - done well  - make me feel loved.  He takes the time to do what needs to be done, and he does it right. More than anything, I love knowing that we're a team.  I know I can count on him to help when I need it - and to offer even when I don't.  

Now, does this translate to passion in other arenas of our relationship (*wink*wink*)?  Not so much.  Are chores sexy?  Not likely.  But that's where other languages, Words of Affirmation and Personal Touch, come into play.  I love being pulled into a hug or having his arms wrapped around from behind as I am cooking at the stove or holding his hand while riding in the car or on a walk or curling up next to him (with my cold feet) in bed at night.  

We also have hundreds of letters that we've written through the course of our courtship (love that old fashioned word) and marriage.  We aren't as good about writing them anymore, but we have gone back and read them. The written word (from a man who tends to be pretty quiet) is quite affirming :)  Both of us are much better at giving compliments than receiving them.

Interestingly, but not surprisingly, CPV took the quiz, too, and found that his love language preference ranks pretty much the same as mine!

So, what's your Love Language?  What did you learn about your relationship?

Sidenote:  The book is worth reading.  I've read it a few times and each time I learn something new and gain an appreciation for the way love is communicated.



Chi-town momma said...

This is a great book. very insightful read!

Miss. Candy said...

Awww, I will have to check that link out!!!

Stasha said...

Wow! You are really lucky to have a guy who does all that without being asked!

gamommy2two said...

You are a lucky woman...and he's a lucky man. My husband is a lot like that too...We're some lucky gals!

Oka said...

He sounds like a dream. The chores don't mean passion to me, but do make me feel loved.

It also doesn't hurt to help me get all the work done done so I'm not so tired later *wink wink*

Blog Widget by LinkWithin