If life suckiness were a contest, which would be lots of fun, I have to tell you that in the past few weeks, my friend Laurie would've won the gold medal, the cheesy trophy, the bronzed piece of dog poop ... whatever the Life Sucks Contest organizers decided was an appropriate prize.
This isn't my story, but I feel compelled to tell it, and I hope to get most of the details right. Laurie hasn't been bitten by the blog bug yet, so if I don't tell this story, it won't get told to the masses ... besides my life hasn't been anywhere near this interesting as of late ... or sucky for that matter :) You should also know that this post is based on a series of phone conversations ... some tear-filled, others peppered with laughter - 'cause sometimes life sucks so bad you cry and when it gets worse, you can't help but laugh :)
A little background ... Laurie's husband, I'll call him PIMP 'cause he'll love that, took a new job in Chicago, which meant a move from the Lone Star State to the Windy City. A move they are excited about, despite the vast difference in weather conditions, primarily because it means that Laurie will get to be a full-time SAHM, and well, what's more delightful than that? The move also meant deciding to be separated for a month. With PIMP heading up to Chi-town to start his new job and enjoy a few weeks of bachelorhood, no doubt ... well, not literally, but you know what I mean! While Laurie and her darling 15-month old son staying behind to tie-up loose ends ... like selling the house, packing an entire house worth of stuff, ... you know, minor details.
Not surprisingly, Laurie handled the month of single parenthood like a rock star, and even managed to get packing down during naptimes ... impressive! And so the month was challenging but manageable, especially with a light at the end of the tunnel. Soon enough they would be together again as a family, in a new town, on a new adventure ... but this story takes a turn of misadventure.
Scratching the surface of suckiness ... the movers took 15 hours to load the truck, twice as long as estimated, which sucks because they were paid hourly ... ouch! The house didn't go to closing as expected because of an issue with the appraisal. Not devastating but an end left untied.
These are things you could deal with, right? I mean things like this happen during a move. But you have to admit, it sucks. And it gets worse ...
So the movers came on Sunday, and by Sunday night, Laurie and Benjamin were "homeless" but staying with friends in Texas until Tuesday when they were schedule to depart on a flight bound for Chicago. On Monday, Benjamin got the stomach flu. Do I need to get graphic here in order for you to fully appreciate the suckiness of his situation? Well, Benjamin puked all over Laurie's friend's house, had constant d-word (yuck!), and felt too crummy to sleep well. That's a tough combination even in the comfort of your own home, but when you're a guest in someone's house ... let's agree, that sucks!
In addition to the inconvenience of having your son puke all over someone else's house, Laurie was also facing a trip to the airport, through security, and on a plane to Chicago. A trip that had been her light at the end of the tunnel, they would finally be reunited with her husband and his daddy, had become a mommy's worst case scenario. A 15-month old puking, pooping machine confined in the cabin of an aircraft ... could she possibly pack enough plastic bags and changes of clothes? Should she even attempt such a feat? When we spoke on the phone, I could tell she was struggling to make a decision ... flying with a sick munchkin wasn't an appealing option, but the thought of staying in Texas - and away from her PIMP - until she could get booked on another flight was pushing her over the edge. She asked, "Would you take Natalie if it was you?" Without hesitation, I assured her that given the circumstances, I would risk the flight if the puking had stopped for at least 4 hours. The pooping could be dealt with ... and hopefully no one would get close enough to risk getting the stomach flu germs from her little man. And so, they did make the flight and at least their family was back together again.
But, the suckiness continued. The moving company was in an accident before the truck even got out of Texas, which delayed their boxes by two days. This especially sucks because Laurie and the PIMP and Benjamin are in their new place with a chair, an inflatable mattress, and a pack-n-play ... and a washing machine that isn't working. Oh, and the puking started again Wednesday morning. Benjamin managed to puke on the one piece of furniture in the house. Not to mention, their supply of clean clothing is dwindling to just about nothing.
I am sincerely hoping this is the end of Laurie's sucky-streak. I've said, "It can't get any worse," and been wrong too many times in this little tale. But for those of you who know Laurie and her family, they are alive and in Chicago ... and hoping for a puke-free day of unpacking tomorrow!
